Monday, 2 December 2013

The Power of The Mind (excerpt from my book)

'What the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve'
Napoleon Hill.

The mind is a truly powerful thing and I don't believe we really appreciate it enough. It is important for you as a carer, and for the person you care for, to remain positive and strong. Attitude and intention is everything.

During Butch’s journey we had positive signs dotted around the house stating ‘I Am Healthy’. I believe that the subconscious doesn’t recognise sarcasm, apathy or jokes. When it hears the words it automatically believes it to be true. By putting signs up it didn’t matter whether Butch was feeling positive or not, he would read the words and his subconscious would get the right message.

Urban Myth: About ten years ago an office full of women decided to get their pap smears done at the same time. One got her result and was advised she had advanced cervical cancer. Nothing could be done to help her. She was given three months to live and sent home to die. Three months after she had passed away the family received a letter stating that her results had been mixed up and she had actually been clear with no sign of cancer. See what I mean about the power of the mind?

Letting a medical practitioner tell your friend/loved one how long they have left is nothing more than a death sentence. The minute it has gone into your head, it's there forever! Even if you think you aren't thinking about it, you are.

We went to one specialist who said that he didn't like to give people die-by-dates as many patients would almost certainly die on demand, lasting the exact amount of time they were given. He knew the power of the mind.

Butch was walking five to ten kilometres every day with a positive outlook up until the day of his last oncology appointment. His specialist told him he had to stop thinking like a well man, he was a very, very sick person, he should not look for another job or go walking, but should just enjoy what time he had left.  He tried hard not to let it affect him, but to him, this was a person in authority who knew what they were talking about. Within a week he was no longer even walking five kilometres. His light of hope had dimmed. He told our daughter later 'The specialist sent me home to die!' I can’t help wondering how many people this has happened to.

(excerpt from Cancer Journey Handbook for Travellers, Carers and Friends by Cherie Nobbs)

Thursday, 4 July 2013

Whose Journey Is This?

Just as a quick question for those of you that are carers or friends of the traveller who is about to embark on this journey. Please remember it is their journey and not yours.
As a bystander one of the hardest things to remember is that this is not your journey. You are there to support and nurture but not to make the final decisions.
 Don't make their decisions for them!!!! Tell them about what you have learnt and let them decide what to do about it! I know you love this person and want what is best for them. That’s great, but a person with cancer has a right to know their options and make their own decisions. It is their life at stake; let them make the hard choices. 
If the person you care about wants to take a line of treatment that you don't agree with or you think another option would have a better result, you can only suggest it to them. They have already lost a degree of control when they are diagnosed; they need to follow what is true and right for them.
Don't try to guilt, bully or cajole him/her into anything that they don't or can't believe in. We all have our own belief systems and we each must choose our own path we wish to travel.
It can be heart breaking at times, especially if their choice doesn't resonate with your beliefs, but ultimately you must remember it is their life and their choice.